A Land For Sale

by Abdiaziz Ahmed
Thursday, September 11, 2008

Land Offer:
Land Size:
637, 661 Square KM (246,201 Square Miles)

Land Population:
9 Million (Less than the State of New York) 0.5% of the population will remain after real estate settlement.

Location Of Land:
East Africa, (AKA) Horn Of Africa. Southeast of Djibouti, east of Ethiopia, northwest of Kenya, across from Yemen, on the southern bank of Gulf Of Aden, and the western bank of Indian Ocean,

Land Descriptions:
Formerly British and Italian colony, this land has two seasons: Wet and Dry seasons (No winter clothing needed): On the wet season, the rain is clean and the land is green. There are few Monsoon seasons but not too many. In the rainy season, its usually humid, but not worst than London or Washington DC. The buyers will breath air so clean; even those with Emphysema wont need oxygen supplies. This land will be suitable for growing anything, which is beneficial to your health. On the dry season, its hot and dry, but no need for Air-conditioner, an umbrella or a simple shade will cool you down. There is no single drop of rain in the dry season, but wait, don't let that scare you off; there is always water under your feet, less than ten meters in wherever you wish to drill. The sun is so hot and close that its just perfect for reusable energy and eco-friendly generators for your everyday energy needs.

Natural Resources:

This Land is capable of sustaining and supporting itself without the need of aid, grants, NGOs of any type of shape, and form. This land has the longest seacoast in Africa; the buyer will benefit harvesting off (Not one) but two seas: the Indian Ocean from north to south, and The Gulf Of Aden from east to west. The seas are so rich of unimaginable marine live (mammal or otherwise), and exotic species (Which, some are in utter extinct elsewhere); fishermen come all the way from Japan just to harvest here. This land has two Rivers running through (Juba and Shabeele). The sub-Saharan to north and the fertile to the south, no two places are the same. There is so much different type of wildlife species wondering around in this land, and the Skyscraping Mountains, the flat plains, and the valleys are the few breathtaking types of scenery worth mentioning to watch these wildlife. (For Your Eyes Only) wildlife: Many different types of reptile species, bird species, vegetarian, and canine species, and insects. The natural resources for your vital needs, crucial for survival, are, but not limited to: Uranium, unexploited reserves of Iron Ore, Tin, Gypsum, Bauxite, Copper, Salt, Natural Gas, Gems, shells and stones, and most likely Oil Reserves. Rare flowers, trees and plants alike, Gums, herbs, and scents of different type. Livestock: Cattle, Camels, Goats, domestic fowl, and Lambs for your everyday "Half & Half" chop, shack, stew, ribs, steak, and rostierre needs.
This land has many natural harbors: Berbera and Lower Juba, to name just the few. Very strategic harboring points for economic, tourism, and recreational purposes. These harbors most definitely won't need huge investments for development; they are God's creation for your enjoyments.

Impressed Yet?
Well, This Land Has Got It All!!

Reason Of Vacating:

A Somali family currently occupies the land. After long and tedious family feud, the family has decided to trash and become Diaspora, then, after many long and failing years of counseling, the family decided to apart. Now there is a land no one wants, full of pirates, warmongers, corrupted family leaders and killers. And now (To top that off) a neighboring family called "Ethiopia" thinks that we're not doing too good of a job and now is doing their best for the destructions (I guess for the bragging rights). I don't know, but I heard the Ethiopian family is out there for the revenge; for something the Somali family did back in 1977. But that's beside the point.
The land needs a true owner. People who would appreciate what this land is offering. The Italian and the Great Britannia always wanted the ownership: Its A Great Place To Own And A Beautiful Land.
This land has tempted the old conquerors: The Greeks, The Ottomans, The Egyptians, The Abyssinians, The Spaniards, The Old Soviet Union, and now The Americans. But this Land was never on sale … Until Now! … Consider Yourselves … LUCKY!

Conditions A Buyer Must Fulfill Before An Offer Is Made.

1)      Buyers must respect the land, the resource and it's environment.
2)      Buyers must provide all transportations needed for such relocation of this magnitude.
3)      Buyers must grant legal status for current occupiers of the land (In Diaspora fashion) and pay the amount of $1,000,000.00 (One Million American Dollars) to each and every member of the Somali family with the exception of .5 (The .5 will remain on the land until farther notice)
4)      Buyers must provide housing projects for the relocates to relocate in (Diaspora fashion) in whichever land they may wish to settle, as immigrants and second-class citizens.
5)      Buyers must clean off all the chemical and nuclear wastes other countries buried, on the soil, and or, in the water, which the Somalis either allowed or got paid for, and restore it's eco.
6)      Buyers must pay the amount of $1,000,000.00 (One Million American Dollars) to each warmonger, pirate, corrupted family leader, warlord, and the killer, for job well done, for making this transaction possible, and for raping this land for the last 18yrs, then putting it up for sale. This would not be possible without them.
7)      Buyers must replace the beliefs, custom, language, culture, and the ethnicity of the Somali Family to the countries' they choose to settle.
8)      Buyers must supply enough Chat (Its a drug) and Coffee shops for the Somali Family, in order for them not to succeed in life for them (Sitting-warriors).
9)      Buyers must also provide Shab (Its the economical slavery called welfare) so they don't have to take up jobs, your natives ought to deserve, for the prevention of xenophobia.

To Apply:

Please post your applications at the "Comment" area.

Note: This is an Equal opportunity land sales. First come First Serviced Basis.

Abdiaziz Ahmed
E-mail: [email protected]

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