By Yvonne DeeneyCommunity Reporter
Sunday October 9, 2022
Prior to starting Bristol Somali Women's Group, Nimo Ibrahim was part of Somali Kitchen, a group advocating for healthy eating and campaigning against fast food. (Image: Yvonne Deeney)
In the Bristol Somali community, women face multiple
difficulties according to Bristol Somali Women’s Group founder Nimo Ibrahim.
Poverty, language barriers and family pressures are just some of the factors
that make it difficult for Somali women to seek support.
Ms Ibrahim set up the city charity to empower women and help
them to open up about the issues they were facing. She said: “It’s very
difficult for a Somali woman to ask for help, they have a stigma attached to
it.
“They really have to trust you. We were brought up as girls
to be quiet and not be hard so it’s very difficult for them to ask for help and
that’s where we come in,” she explained.
Alongside looking after five children and working as a
carer, Ms Ibrahim volunteers as a support worker, helping to empower women in
her community, many of whom live in Lawrence Hill ward, one of the most
deprived in Bristol. Following the recent pandemic, the UK has seen a rise in
mental illness and domestic abuse. Ms Ibrahim wants to now make these issues a
central focus. She feels it is important for Somali women to be able to talk
about these issues and provide a safe space for women to express themselves
freely.
After coming out of an abusive relationship herself, she has
an understanding of the issues that some women in her community are facing. She
tried for many years to keep her marriage, concerned about the impact a
separation would have on her children.
But when she finally left, her children asked her why she
didn’t do so sooner. When she told them that she wanted them to be with their
dad, their response was that ‘he was never present’.
“I used to think, if something happens to me, who’s going to
help me? If a child gets sick, who is going to help me? Ms Ibrahim said: “I
used to worry about so many things which were not real because when he was with
me, he wasn’t doing any of that but in my head, I believed that he was helping
and that the children need their dad.
“It’s a belief that is put in our heads that if you’re
married you should stay, no matter what. Domestic abuse is real, mental health
is real and it’s something that we really need to focus on when it comes to our
community.”
Using her voice, resources and education to empower other
Somali women in Bristol has not been easy. Ms Ibrahim said that there is a lot
of pressure particularly from older women who tell women not to leave but
through her community work she has seen the negative effects on their health
and wellbeing.
Ms Ibrahim said: “The problem is that there are few Somali
women who are out there, who can speak the language and who have gone through
this. I do this because I was there and I’ve seen everything first-hand and I
am among the few of us who are out there and are ready to speak about it.
“I tell the other mums, I was there, I’m still struggling,
my children are a bit older, I was able to learn English. There’s those mums
who are older than us and they’re telling us, ‘you should listen to your
husband, it doesn’t matter if he’s married to two other women.’
“That is pulling them back, which I don’t think is right,
nobody should stay in a domestic abusive relationship whatsoever. I tell them,
‘look at what you’re teaching your daughter and your son at the same time.’
“Those women who stayed ended up suffering with other health
difficulties. They end up getting high blood pressure and all other illnesses,
by the time they’re in their 50s, they have a very bad quality of life because
they don't take care of themselves."
Bristol Somali Women’s Group has been active in the city since its inception in
2015. Although Ms Ibrahim's current focus is on domestic abuse and mental
health, at its core the group’s ethos is one of empowerment at every level.
Bristol Somali Women's Group joined the Sudanese community in Bristol for International Women's Day, 2016 (Image: Bristol Somali Women's Group)
Ms Ibrahim has supported parents whose children are
underachieving, volunteering as an advocate and interpreter at parents evenings
to ensure that help is put in place for families who may not have the
confidence or English language skills to access support services.
They have held various drop in sessions and events over the
years to provide a space where women can come together, socialise and build up
their support networks. They also worked with the former councillor Afzal Shah
during the pandemic to deliver food to NHS workers at Southmead hospital
alongside handing out food to the homeless in Bristol.
The cost of living crisis and the pandemic created
additional challenges for a community that was already struggling with economic
difficulties. Ms Ibrahim said she has been fortunate in recent years and was
able to raise funds among her family to pay the hospital fees to support her
mother in Somalia and visit her before she passed away from Covid a year ago.
It has been a struggle for Ms Ibrahim, who at one point did
not have enough money to get a bus into the city centre and had to walk there
and back with three young children. She sees the ongoing struggle particularly for
single parents like herself who have to financially support their children in
Bristol alongside family in Somalia.
Ms Ibrahim said: “It’s challenging because we are struggling
here and 90 per cent have family back home. We are people who live in a community,
so you help your auntie. It’s your responsibility if she doesn’t have anything,
you'll help your cousin, your neighbour across the road, and you'll help
anybody who is in need.
“We are struggling as we are, most of the mum’s here can
barely speak English, they can’t do their own CV, they can’t look for work, we
are struggling with all that and the cost of living has just hit the roof and
most of them are living on the poverty line."